2014. Who woulda thought I’d be writing this year. Well, I’m starting it out in bed, with the hints of influenza creeping up my spine and giving me just cause to take it easy while bringing forth my new year. So I thought I’d write to ease my way and see if anyone out in Virtualand is actually reading. Here goes.
My email is full of ads and a couple greetings from well-wishers who don’t “do” Facebook. Alas I may soon be one of those who eases off the FB daily perusement. It’s so darn “time” consuming and if I’m going to get absolutely anything “done” I had better quit surfing the posts about cutesy animals doing inter-species dating, even though it is kinda sweet, all those lions and tigers and bears, oh my! Yes, I admit to my own fare share of sharing helpful hints and unproven conspiracy theories, but that’s what makes it all so damn entertaining, doesn’t it? Mea culpa.
I’ve also stopped promoting my meditation classes even though I have a FB “Conscious Meditation group” since no one from Facebook every really shows up even when they RSVP…i believe they are those people who commit to everything and do actually nothing who are responding through the social medium of FB.. The ones who really go out of their way and contact me for meditation call me up out of the blue or green and say, “hey janet, are you doing the Wednesday meditation thing again? If so, is there room? To which I say “yes, I will save a place for you.” And that is that. They come and sit, we breathe and get all relaxed and shit, its cool. The class itself is for me anyway…it just keeps me on top of my own “sit and do nothing except breathe, relax and get over yourself” practice which I am committed to practicing until I get it down good, at which time I will cease the classes and merely bi-locate all by myself.
It is with great joy I have resolved to write daily. Where and about whom is up in the air flittering and fluttering about like a hummingbird high on nectar. Where the little humming bird lands is anyone’s guess. Makes it fun for me anyway. There, I have said “it” here in the presence of all who might deign to read my proclamation, though i believe there are only a handful of peeps actually reading this. So many of my “friends” are too busy reading more important FB stuff to actually bother with my words. Oh well. And since no one is reading I can pronounce all sorts of things which only the Goddess and my sweet Max in the great Beyond will take notice. I wonder will that make me feel neglected? Not really. I’m so committed to finally making my own art a significant part of my daily practice that it is only vital I know I’m doing it. This is such a switch in my thinking, being, doing. It is best to keep clear of my studio if you know what’s good for you, unless you’re invited. I’m busy. God that feels good to say.
Ad. with the above statement I realize the rotten feeling of the impending gripe has passed. I’m coughing intermittently now so the New Years blah is almost kaput. Must’ve been a remnant of 2013’s coming to grips with my life sans Max. Grief is shitty. Necessary. But still very shitty. Funny how every time I think I’m done with the wailing, weeping, woe is me bullshit of mourning I get a wave of tears or some ailment to remind me I’m not in control. For the controlling person I’ve known myself to be this is frustrating in the extreme, but lately I’ve been saying, to no one in particular, “Bring it on, sucker!” This way I can control my lack of control. Hey it works for me.
My determination to be in tip top,creative shape means I’m gonna get on my healthier than thou might imagine diet again. You know, organic, mostly vegan, gluten free but loaded with chocolate. Hell, I don’t drink …hence i gotta do the chocolate thing. As usual my sweet doggies are going to keep me in excellent physical shape this year. I’m going to work daily in my garden. Declutter my home. Take a class in something unpopular like basket weaving. Donate time reading to kids….and more.
I am so full of new year’s resolve, I am sounding like a patent pending Get in Shape Now TV infomercial…which is why I’m posting this on Facebook. Share if you like. I don’t really care. I’m on a roll.