Days of my Life #32

Mom’s the word.

Days of my Life #32

Yeah. Yeah. it’s Mother’s Day. And….I’m a mother. Big deal. I’ve got two wonderful kids and a fab daughter-in-law. I’ve got two adorable grandkids. I’ve even got several dog children. Woof. I’m lucky, I suppose. So what the fuck is wrong with me? Why aren’t I in an “awe gee” mood, with invisible hearts emanating from my very being…like sparklers, or those live emoji plug ins on Facebook messenger? Because I didn’t get a box of dark, organic, gourmet chocolates or a pot of exotic flowers? Nope, didn’t want em. Or Because I didn’t get breakfast in bed? Naw ah, not that either. I preferred making my own breakfast. My wonderful daughter even gave me a cool piece of Lisa Crowder jewelry, a necklace that says “Resist”, for which I should be flipping cartwheels about, cause it is really neato. But I’m non-plussed.

I think it’s because its hard for me to get excited about anything. Poor me. No. You don’t have to say or do anything. I need to wallow in a bit of self pity and over-boredom. I have my rights you know, as a mother to do a bit of bitching and moaning and napping. I’ve paid my share of dues. And now I’m collecting on the interest.

A few decades ago I read a newspaper comic strip called “Momma” by Mell Lazarus whose character was a nagging, sarcastic yet endearing, mother. I believe I may have inadvertently learned some pointers from the 2D mom, or at the very least her creator. It seemed that no matter what her kid did, it was never enough. An oy vey, did she throw on the guilt (like butter on crumpets)…making sure to fill in all holes with a gooey woe of his attempts to placate his Momma.

Now, though I obviously took notes, I’ve been quite cognizant that too much guilt can push your kid/s too far. I know my limits (and theirs). I also learned from squirrels. Yes, you read that correctly. Squirrels are smart, quick little creatures whose ability to keep one eye on the nut and the other eye on let’s say a cat or a dog who might be interested in a game of tag you’re lunch. Isn’t that why they’ve got one eye on each side of their face? As usual I am going somewhere with this but my train of thought is slowing down and altering its course ever so slightly.

And just where do I think I am going, you ask? Unfortunately Nowhere. I’ve got my one eye on positive attention and my left on being persona non grata if I forget the other, which is why I can’t overdo my guilt trips… none of us are going anywhere for the time being, thusly It would be neither wise nor funny of me. Well, maybe funny if only I had a secure means of escape, to let’s say New Zealand where it is reported that the virus is no longer welcome.

Of course one doesn’t need to be a mother to feel out of sorts today or for that matter the past two months. We would all (or most of us) want to shop, go to school, travel and work (?) looking less like armed bank robbers and more like “normal” people. And speaking of normal I don’t believe we’re going to go back to feeling “normal”, whatever that was.

I’m not going to bring up politics today except to say that I’m not bringing it up. I’ve got enough to worry about. But don’t worry about me.

Tune in.

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