Okay everybody. Don’t like someone/something? Or … don’t like what’s happening in your life/world/government/neighborhood? Let’s just stop it. Now. We can change. We can now choose to cease our behavior and grow as infinitely better beings.
“What’s that?” I hear you say, “But she or he said ‘blah, blah, blah…and this happened there…blah, blah…’ And I didn’t like it! It’s too hard and I can’t stop/change/forgive, unless they do first.” Maybe not.
Grow up. Get over it. Really, how old do we have to be before we cease pointing fingers and telling lies (mostly to ourselves, to solidify our position and to continue to be pissed off) about someone/thing else so we can somehow make ourselves “right”? How much longer must we feel it necessary to beat the crap out of our “enemies”? How much time do we wish to spend find reasons to be separate from one another?
Come on. Have you asked yourself…. What am I focusing on in my life that I have so much time to spread half truths without checking facts, declare someone wrong, find fault….? Simpler, maybe better still… “Can I focus on the really, nitty gritty, all-important stuff for me and do my own part? To become all I desire to be, Now?” 
Okay, the original impetus for my beginning this diatribe was someone else’s Facebook post. Yes, I am on Facebook, what’s it to you? The mini-ramble was political in nature and included all the finger-pointing shit that is all the rage (I do also mean the anger-promoting type, besides the “popular” one).
Is there any difference between my exercise or theirs? You can decide, provided you choose to read on. I have faith you may go for it. If not, have a nice day. I’m going in. And don’t worry, you don’t have to make me “right” or them “wrong”, that would be missing my point. Of course the ball is in your proverbial court. In actuality, I ain’t pointing my finger at anyone specifically, except myself, but if this touches you in any particular way…enjoy the tickle.
My trip to this beautiful land of sun, sand, water and ouzo has given me the opportunity to explore motivation…my own and then if I get anything (more often now, I do) that of others. What moves you to change something in your life? For me, in my past, it has been…guess what…a life changing event, duh!
For us all, change, be it from birth, death, marriage, divorce, getting fired from a job, moving residences & schools, getting a new car, accident from said car, etc…all serve to change our lives to one extent or another….all to varying degrees. I found that the changes, from calm to static, can and will bring up all sorts of emotions. For me, fear was usually the initial resulting emotion, and then I’d travel unawares, up and down the scale of emotional harmonics: grief, sadness, anger, apathy, unconsciousness (much worse than apathy), enthusiasm, love… Not always in that order; some or all, would follow or precede, often wreaking havoc and destruction in my wake, as I responded to the change I was experiencing. My consciousness, was rather UN; I was too busy reacting. I didn’t even consider there was an alternate behavior. It was as if I were a puppet, propelled through these events by some unseen force…”the devil made me do it”. And I recoiled from impending change often, fighting it, arguing with others about it to prove my right-ness, getting sick when it occurred (or just before or after, take your pick) and being so damn upset I might occasionally puke, and I did from time to time.
My sweet, beloved, divine partner, Maxie, when we first met, had begun developing a course entitled, “esc” or “embracing sacred change”… I knew he was the “one” for me. I must’ve thought to myself, quite unconsciously, “Now, through our relationship, I’ll figure out this whole ‘change’ thing”. Little did I know then how true that would actually prove to be.
Before I met Max, in the mid-late 1980’s, a miracle happened. No, not all of Orwell’s prophesies (and those wouldn’t have been exactly miracles anyway). I call the event my “Carlos Castaneda moment of meeting the Nagual- Don Juan, or, my buddha quote-proving event “when-the-student-is-ready-the-teacher-appears”. It was the most important event in my life.
Yes, having my children, grandchild, falling in love with Max, getting married to two other men before, divorcing those “others”, the deaths of my parents, etc, all were extremely important, and life-affirming (some traumatic) life events, but my first meeting with my teacher, Aristhaia, meant I finally became aware of my path to meeting me, my own sense of the divine presence, that is within each being in existence and all who ever were. (Whew! I’ve blasted yet another big one out into the virtual universe…there are really no permanent secrets anyway).
When we met, in the midst of a large crowd, (the farthest place I could’ve imagined this sort of life-altering event might occur) she stated, quite simply, “Think of me as your telephone operator (they had them in those days)…I’m just helping you make your own connection.” I was too dumbfounded as she proceeded to tell me what she knew about me that only I knew! There was no Google then nor the 8 pages about me. So she was, weird as it seemed, the real deal, and she was totally, in the biggest way, correct. I began to meet me, for the first time. Needless to say, as she spoke further, I was compelled to listen, and, contrary to my previous history of being in school, it was then I chose to become a real, honest to goodness (the emphasis here is on “Good”, I might add) student.
“Oh god, she’s getting all airy-fairy, witchy-woo-woo, spiritual mumbo-jumbo on us! Obviously she’s not a Christian, Jew, etc.!” You may think. Whatever you think, its okay. Is there really any difference between any of these beliefs, other than our individual interpretations of what we consider the unknown and sacred? Because someone else wrote or talked about something with conviction does not necessarily mean it is or is not true to you, or me. Please consider. Aren’t we all deeply desiring the comfort of being held by this wonderful awesome power of which we may have sprung and are all connected? Whether you believe in some humongous guy in the sky, wielding a hammer, a lightning bolt, mating with unsuspecting virgins, being hatched out of a lotus, planting humans in gardens, manifesting life from stardust, and on, and on…is really your personal choice.
All of these are totally delightful options in which to believe, because as humans, those of us who make the choice, are allowed to vary our beliefs…and even change them, in most cases, if we so desire. The idea that you are “wrong” because you don’t believe as I is just plain silly. I can’t tell you how many, mostly women, (there have been men too) have sat next to me on airplanes, at train stations and in cafes who have begun conversations with, “Are you a Christian? Republican? Democrat…et al.. (You pick ’em, I’ve had em)”. Only to continue the remaining together time (what most often seems to me interminably long) with a futile attempt to further convince me I should choose to be “saved” now, without them even considering or stopping their converto-blasts to hear if we might actually agree…on some thing, however minute. It both amuses and worries me when I get someone like this as a seat/bench/table mate. So compelled by the fury of their convictions they cannot or will not listen and me remembering to breathe, center myself and remember my compassion in the presence of such furor. I am most willing to learn but not be force fed. I am not alone in these experiences. (It can’t just happen to me, can it?)
And what does “Change” have to do with “separation” and “getting along”, anyway? Our “security” of holding on to feelings, ideas or beliefs which no longer serve us, for fear of embracing the change in front of us. This blatant desire to enforce our beliefs on others or to compel people to cow-tow to the rules of those who believe themselves right and others wrong, must stop now.
I am reminded of the late and infamous “Rodney King”, who, in his post LA riot recovery-interview- wisdom stated, “Can we all just get along?” It is highly doubtful he considered making this statement while he was leading police on his high speed chase through the streets and freeways of Los Angeles county, while he was been pummeled by the frustrated members of the LAPD, or before this all happened, even when he was a small child at play on the schoolyard? It is suggested his insightful words may have been those of his post-riot handlers. That matters little. What matters now is the resulting implication of his question.
“Can we all just get along?” And let our bygones not be our present…and instead be the life-affirming conscious catalyst for us to embrace sacred change and eachother. After all, we are all connected, if the only thing we choose to find in common currently is the belief that gravity holds us to our earth and we humans all must breathe air. I believe we ARE going to be alright, that we can more than “just” get along.
How about you? I’m looking forward to your comments!
the picture above is of olive trees dotting the landscape of Lesbos
Janet Bernson 