I’m up later than my usual 3AM stirrings, but that was because last night, held outside our room, around the main swimming pool, was a Very Large, maybe not so fat, Greek Wedding, until 4AM. I have slept maybe 3 hours…and am surprisingly, and perhaps, only temporarily awake, considering the joyous and quite loud, I may add, celebrations.
Funny to have a wedding on an island called Lesbos, where both men and women here are lesbians! Yes, I Googled the root of the word, lesbian. Did you know the ancient female Greek poet, Sapphos first wrote of emotional love between women? She was from Lesbos and hence, the first lesbian on record who loved other women….And the Greeks are uptight about gay marriage? Have they read their own history? Oy!
But, as i have digressed, i will now return to my subject…. Who am I to complain when a beautiful couple (this one heterosexual) make the choice to love and live together in wedded bliss? Weddings are fun reasons to have a party with friends and family (and strangers trying to sleep in nearby rooms?). And so here I am, it’s 530AM on a Monday morning in Kalloni Village, the cats arguing (or are they screwing?) outside are music to my early morning, “after the fete” ears, and I am contemplating the true meaning of love.
Love…Max and I had/have that in spades.
We were/are so fortunate to find each other, especially after half a century playing out relationships that afforded us only a smidgen of what we so luckily discovered with eachother. We spent eight “damn good” years together, then Max moved on to the next plane of existence, leaving me to discover the joy of living as ONE, again. Without him physically here to cuddle, hold hands, kiss, hold doors, share a meal, sleep, make love, garden, walk dogs, write, make art, rehearse, shower, hold Levi, meet new people, learn new things, meditate, travel, read…I do these, mostly alone, now. Some I find difficult to imagine…making love for example – I am, at the moment, not ready to embrace another man…Max is a tough act to follow. Still I suppose, if I am thinking about this at all, anything is possible. For now, embracing my love and life within me is my glorious task at hand.
Ah, the birds are doing their morning chirp-a-thon. This area on the isle of Lesbos is a sanctuary for wildlife (last night may be no exception…those Greeks know how to party). There are tons of flamingos and other over 100 other species of birds, bats (see Austin, you’re not the only place bats are considered totally cool), porpoises, seals… And me, learning to partner with my divine self, to love my life again, all of us here, protected in this beautiful place. The revelers of last night’s wedding are sleeping, finally, and I too will go back to bed for an hour or two then wake to explore the island and my life. Wish me luck. I’ll tell you how it goes.
Janet Bernson 